


Tempora Mutantur

by sixtotenpotatoes (schiefergrau)



Category: Crooked Media RPF
Genre: Found Family, Getting Together, LA Era (Crooked Media RPF), M/M, Time Travel, White House Era (Crooked Media RPF), Yuletide Treat, kid!Lovett, recurring time travel, teen!Lovett
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-21
Updated: 2018-12-21
Packaged: 2019-09-23 11:31:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,296
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17079524
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/schiefergrau/pseuds/sixtotenpotatoes
Summary: “Tommy,” Jon says with all the earnestness he can find in himself, “I think I’m a time traveler.”





	Tempora Mutantur

**Author's Note:**

  * For [kenopsia (indie)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/indie/gifts).



> In the light of current events:  
> If you know someone mentioned in this story or are mentioned yourself, please click away. This is a work of fiction about fictional characters who happen to share their names and faces with some real people. I'm aware of the difference between them, and I trust you are as well.  
> Please do not share this work with anyone outside of fandom spaces.
> 
> Many thanks to [obsessivelymoody](https://archiveofourown.org/users/obsessivelymoody/pseuds/obsessivelymoody) for beta reading.

**1987/2007**

Jon Lovett just turned five when he feels the pull on his spine for the first time.

At first, he barely notices it, too focused on all the shiny new things to pay any attention. He’s got a stuffed bunny in his arms, nearly half his own size and a science for kids set in front of him on the table, and really, that’s so much more interesting than the tingle in his back.

But it gets stronger and stronger, and just when Jon thinks about yelling for his Mom, telling her he’s feeling weird, he’s getting yanked backward and everything around him turns dark.

Jon desperately tries to hold on to the table, but his hand reaches into thin air, and his body is pulled by an invisible force through nothingness. His mouth opens for a scream that never comes.

Jon Lovett just turned five, and he’s afraid it’s going to be his last birthday.

*

“Hey, hey kiddo, everything alright? Are you lost? Where are your parents?” A voice suddenly cuts through silence and darkness.

Jon’s eyes shoot open to look for the source of the voice—and immediately closes them again. He’s not in his room anymore. All his toys, bare of Hoppy in his arms, are gone. Instead, he’s somewhere on a street and a stranger is kneeling in front of him.

He doesn’t understand. He doesn’t understand what’s happening, doesn’t know where he is, doesn‘t know who the man is.

His little heart is beating too hard, too fast against his chest and tears begin to prickle behind his eyelids.

Jon’s hands dig deeper into Hoppy’s soft fur and he desperately tries to be brave and remember what his parents taught him.

Don’t get lost.

Don’t talk to strangers.

If you get lost find the nearest police station, they will help you.

Jon carefully opens one eye to check if the man might be from the police, but it doesn’t seem like he has any luck. No uniform. Not a police uniform at least, just a boring adult uniform.

He still needs to make sure, so he asks, “Are you a policeman?” He holds Hoppy a bit closer. It’s hard to be brave.

The stranger looks perplexed and then laughs. “What? No, sorry, I’m not a policeman. I have a much less exciting job.”

“Then I’m not allowed to talk to you,” Jon explains and presses his lips together.

The stranger sighs but nods. “Oh, okay. That’s very smart of you. Are your parents somewhere around?”

Jon shrugs and shakes his head at the same time because he doesn’t think they are? Not that he knows where _he_ is, but it’s so entirely unfamiliar that he’s sure he landed here by accident.

“No? How did you get here?”

Jon impatiently points at his lips, still tightly pressed together. He already explained to the man he isn’t allowed to talk to him, how hard is that to understand?

The stranger stands up to his full height and Jon feels real fear run through his body for the first time. When he wanted the man could carry Jon to his van, or whatever else it is adults worry about. The man looks around, probably searching for Jon’s parents. Who probably sit safe at home while Jon is—wherever he actually is.

“Shit, I don’t have time for this,” the stranger says, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“You shouldn’t cuss,” Jon says before he remembers the not-talking-thing.

“Fair enough,” the stranger says. “But listen, I really have somewhere to be, and I can’t leave you standing here alone. How about I bring you to the next police station?”

“I’m not allowed to go with strangers.”

The man sighs deeply. “Okay, how about this: Hi, I’m Tommy. I’m 26, from the Boston area and I work in politics. My favorite animals are dogs and I hate cauliflower. How about you?”

“My name’s Jon and I’m five years and one day old,” Jon says. “And I love dogs. Do you have a dog?”

“No, not at the moment,” Tommy says and makes a sad face. “But I grew up with them and my mother still has dogs.”

“Why don’t you live with her then?”

“Because I’m too old to live at home, Jon,” Tommy explains, and yes, that makes sense. Adults don’t really live with their parents anymore, do they?

“But talking about home, let’s get you there, okay? We know each other a bit now, and I promise you I’ll just bring you to the police station and then I’m gone.”

Jon thinks about it for a moment. He shouldn’t go with a stranger. On the other hand, he can hardly be expected to stand here until a policeman comes across him by accident now, can he?

So he nods, if hesitantly. “Okay.”

They don’t come further than to the end of the street when the tug on his spine returns, and a couple of steps further he again is yanked back into darkness.

*

When he opens his eyes this time he’s back at home, back with Hoppy in his arms sitting at the table, science for kids set in front of him.

“Mom? Dad?” He yells for them, partly to check if he’s really at home again, partly to tell them what just happened.

They don't believe a single word he says.

 

 

**1989/2008**

Jon’s reading the book he got for his birthday, huddled under the covers with a flashlight so his parents won’t catch him. It’s already way past his bedtime, but he really needs to finish this chapter or he won’t be able to sleep at all, Jon knows that.

It’s his parents’ fault, really. They were the ones who decided to buy him the book, after all, Jon thinks, and is impressed by his flawless logic. And he doesn’t even need that much sleep, really. He’s seven already, he can stay up after 10 pm, no problem!

Ten pages later he feels his eyelids getting heavier and heavier, and he considers that maybe ten might be a bit late for him when he feels the tug on his spine for the second time.

The first thought Jon has is that it’s strangely validating. When he tried telling his Mom about it she had just laughed and praised his lively imagination. But Jon knows he didn’t imagine being pulled away from his room! He didn’t imagine the strange looking side street or the man who said his name was Tommy, or the cars that looked so different from the ones home and he didn’t imagine being more confused than ever before in his life. He didn’t imagine it.

The last thing he can do before being pulled into darkness is to grab Hoppy by one ear, and then everything turns black.

*

“What the…?” A voice says, audible confused.

Jon’s sure he knows the voice and when he opens his eyes he sees the same man he met the last time. At least there’s one constant to this. Tommy didn’t kidnap him the last time, he probably won’t this time either.

“Tommy!” He exclaims and takes a few shaky steps into Tommy’s direction. 

He sits at a table and there’s something standing in front of him that Jon doesn’t recognize, but there are more pressing matters right now.

“Jon?” Tommy asks hesitantly.

“Yes,” Jon says, scandalized that Tommy doesn’t seem to remember him. It’s been two years, yes, and sure, and Jon has grown since then, but he still looks like himself!

Tommy has a furrow between his brows when he kneels down next to him. “What are you doing here? Where did you vanish to the last time? And how did you even get in here?”

Jon shrugs. “I don’t know. I was reading a book under my covers and then ‘boom’, everything turns black and I’m here. That’s also how I vanished the last time.”

He earns a very skeptical look and then remembers that he didn’t actually talk very much about his theories with Tommy the last time. He barely talked to Tommy at all. But he’s pretty sure by now that this whole thing isn’t orchestrated just to kidnap him, and Tommy’s somehow equally as unwilling part of this as Jon himself, so he thinks it’s only fair to tell him about his theories.

“Tommy,” Jon says with all the earnestness he can find in himself, “I think I’m a time traveler.”

“Okay,” Tommy simply says but stands back up on his feet. “Are you tired, time-traveler? You said you were in bed before you traveled through time, and I really need to finish this work. I was just about to start when you appeared, so it would be really awesome if you _were_ tired.”

“So you admit I appeared!” Jon feels triumphant. Maybe this could be the first adult to believe him?

“Well, I was looking at my laptop, and when I looked back up you stood there. So you either somehow managed to sneak in here, which would be very impressive. Or—,” Tommy says and pauses for a huge sigh, “—you indeed appeared. Which either confirms what you’re saying or says very bad things about my mental state. And I don’t have time to entertain either of those ideas.”

“What’s a laptop?” Jon asks, confused what Tommy’s talking about, but then he remembers the second part of Tommy’s sentence. “Also, that sounds like I _appeared_.”

“Maybe,” Tommy says, rubbing a hand over his eyes. “Or I finally went crazy the whole way.”

Jon looks at him for a long time. He doesn’t look crazy, just very tired, and Jon thinks he should probably tell him because _he_ as a time traveler understands better than anyone how strange this is.

“You don’t look like a crazy person, Tommy. My father calls the old lady at the end of our street crazy, and you look nothing like her. You don’t even have a crazy hat.”

Tommy grimaces. “I don’t need a crazy hat to go insane, my workload is already doing that for me.”

Jon doesn’t think he’s equipped to help with that problem. He can’t at home, so why would he be able here? He goes over to sit on the bed, getting cold and indeed a bit tired, despite the excitement. Or maybe because. 

“Do you want to talk about it?” He asks, pulling the sheets up to his nose. Because while he may not be able to help Tommy, it’s still polite to offer others to talk about their problems. Even if he’s really tired. He tries to hide a yawn behind his hand.

Tommy looks surprised for a second, then he laughs. “Thank you, buddy, but I don’t really feel like venting about my job to the child that appeared in my hotel room… Oh my god, this is such a fucked up situation. Are you sure you didn’t just take the wrong door and went into my room and your parents are somewhere around?”

“’m sure ‘bout that,” Jon says, sinking deeper into the sheets and presses Hoppy against his chest, hoping Tommy will believe him. That would make everything so much easier. It’s still scary to think about it, this time traveling thing. Especially because it’s the first time in Jon’s life that even adults have no idea what is happening. But they will return home, just like last time. Jon’s sure, so he tries his hardest not to worry. He looks around, in hope of something that lets him think of something else than the uneasy feeling in his stomach. 

It’s not hard, finding things that are different, so he points at the black thing mounted to the wall. “I’m also sure I’ve never seen something like that.”

Tommy looks between him and the black thing. “The… TV?”

“That’s not a TV!” Jon protests. “TV’s can’t be that flat! I learned from a book how they work, and there’s this tube inside that’s necessary to make a picture, and that thing has no place for a tube, and—”

Tommy interrupts him, an apprehensive frown on his face. “Jon, tell me—which year were you born in?”

“1982, why?” Jon answers, slightly annoyed that Tommy doesn’t even try to back up his made up story about it being a TV.

Tommy gets pale around the nose and looks at him out of wide eyes. “So you think it’s—I mean, for you, it’s currently the year 1989?”

“Of course it is,” Jon exclaims. “That’s what I’ve been telling you! Last time I was here everything looked so different from home. The cars looked different. The streets! And you had a phone! It’s supposed to be 1989, nobody has a phone when they’re outside.”

“In 2008 people do,” is all Tommy says. He’s still pale and Jon thinks this might be a good sign, maybe Tommy will actually believe him.

“So was it 2006 the last time I was here?”

“No, you’ve been here last year.”

“No, that was last year, no two years ago!” Jon shakes his head. Tommy has it all wrong.

“Oh, has it been two years for you? I was surprised by how much you’ve grown in such a short time…”

Despite Tommy’s initial reluctance, they talk about the possibility that this is indeed time-travel for so long that Jon’s eyes fall shut against his will, again and again.

He can’t remember falling asleep, but he wakes up the next morning in his own bed, face pressed into his book and Hoppy still in his arms. 

 

 

**1991/2009**

This time it doesn’t come as a surprise to Jon. He waits for the tingle in his spine as soon as his birthday is over, a mix of excitement and anxiety bubbling through him. He can’t be sure it’s going to happen again, but the first time was after his _fifth_ birthday, and the second time he was _seven_ , so if this follows a logical pattern, and he hopes it does, then it’s going to happen again.

And Jon shouldn’t be disappointed. Just minutes after he wakes up the tingle starts. He doesn’t even have time to change into proper clothing before he’s pulled back.

*

“Oh, coming right from your own bed again, I see?” is the first thing he hears.

Tommy’s standing in an unfamiliar room, arms crossed in front of his chest and grinning at Jon. Well, at least Jon’s not the only one who isn’t surprised anymore.

“Hi,” Jon says, giving Tommy a nod before he lets himself get distracted by taking the new environment in.

“Hi yourself, “ Tommy says, “how are you? And how old are you now?”

“Nine,” Jon answers absentmindedly, letting his eyes wander across the room. There are some things here that are utterly unfamiliar to him. And some things he wouldn’t have necessarily expected Tommy to own. The pink vase on the table, for example, holding a colorful flower arrangement.

“Do you live alone?” He asks, suddenly curious about Tommy’s life, now that he sees his home for the first time.

“No, I live with my girlfriend,” Tommy says and pauses momentarily, looking thoughtfully at Jon. “I’m not sure if I should even tell you that but I don’t suppose that’s some kind of crucial information in any way.”

Jon looks around the room, but it’s empty aside from Tommy and him. “Is she somewhere here right now?”

Tommy laughs. “No, gladly she’s out of the country at the moment. Would be a bit hard to explain to her why I have a kid over.”

“You could say I’m your cousin from out of town,” Jon suggests. He and Tommy look nothing alike, but Jon doesn’t really look a lot like his actual cousins either, so he doesn’t think that will matter very much.

“I _could_ , but I prefer not to lie to her—and fortunately I won’t have to,” Tommy says.

“Probably not,” Jon agrees and is suddenly reminded to tell Tommy about his new thoughts on time-travel. “I have a theory. I think I will stay for two hours this time.”

“You think? Hm, makes sense. The last time you stayed for about one hour, and the first time—well I don’t know, but 30 minutes could very well be.”

“Yes!” Jon’s glad Tommy agrees with him. “I don’t know if this is following any logical pattern or not, but so far everything says it does.”

“Would be nice if it does. There are several occasions in my life where you time-traveling into would at least be a mild catastrophe.”

“Why?” Jon eyes him curiously. 

“Because I’m an adult with a very adult job where a randomly appearing child would be a big fucking deal.”

“What do you work as? Could your job be the reasons why I’m here? Are you some kind of mean factory owner who I need to convince to pay his workers more?”

First Tommy looks like he’s going to laugh, then like he’s about to answer the questions—but then he snaps his mouth shut as if he thought better of it. “I can’t tell you that. We don’t know what the consequences could be.”

“What do you mean? What consequences?”

“How would I know? I’m not exactly an expert on time-travel—and neither are you, by the way. We don’t know what happens if you learn things about the year we’re in and then go back to your timeline. We don’t know what could happen…”

“Why does it matter? I just want to know why I get sent here?” Jon liked cooperative Tommy a whole lot more than this version, that’s for sure. 

“Are you hungry? I can make breakfast,” says Tommy and gestures for Jon to follow him. He’s very obviously trying to evade the topic, but Jon’s not having it!

“Hey, don’t you want to know why I’m here? Aren’t you curious at all?” He asks, trailing after Tommy.

“Of course I’m curious. But I don’t think it has anything to do with my job. So I don’t want to talk about that with you.”

“Why can you just decide that? That’s not fair! What if that’s the key, Tommy?”

“It’s not, I promise you. Let’s talk about something else.”

It sounds very final and also feels like it when Tommy takes a carton of eggs from the fridge instead of looking at Jon.

“Ugh, old people are the worst,” Jon mutters and hops on one of the counters. Tommy gives him a pointed look when Jon brings his legs up to cross them, but he doesn’t say anything about it.

“How old do you think I am?” He asks instead.

“I don’t know? Fifty maybe?” Jon isn’t really interested in Tommy’s age. He’s an adult and a _boring one_ in addition. 

Tommy laughs. “I’m not even thirty yet!”

Jon rolls his eyes. “Is there a difference?” He knows adults can sometimes be sensitive about their age, and he’s just trying to get a rise out of Tommy. It’s what he deserves for trying to not have the conversation Jon wants to have.

But Tommy doesn’t seem to be one of those adults. He doesn’t engage in it and instead asks, “I thought you were supposed to be good at math?”

Jon glances up at Tommy. “I don’t remember telling you that?”

“We talked about it last time you came to ‘visit’,” Tommy says and turns back to the stove—but not before Jon can see his ears turn red.

“We did not!” He protests, sure Tommy knows he’s right.

“Then I suppose it was a lucky guess.”

 

Jon’s sure there’s more to it, but he also knows by now that Tommy’s stubborn. He’s not just going to give in to Jon trying to annoy him. So he crossed his arms and says, “Also, math is more than numbers anyway and you know I didn’t mean it like that.”

“You’re pretty smart for your age,” Tommy says. It kind of sounds like a peace offering.

“Everyone else is an idiot,” Jon mutters and he means everyone, including Tommy, the not-wanting-to-talk-about-time-travel-idiot.

Tommy nods. “Fair enough,” he says and pulls the pan off the stove, giving Jon a small smile. “Breakfast’s ready.”

*

They eat in companionable silence for a while until Jon can’t contain himself anymore. “Why don’t you want to talk about time travel with me? At this point, you’re basically believing me, because there’s no other explanation and you know that! I couldn’t have aged four years in three of _your_ years. Also, people also normally don’t just appear out of thin air.”

“You’re right, there’s no logical explanation,” Tommy agrees, putting his fork aside, looking at Jon earnestly. “I have no idea what is happening, but if it is time travel then I think I should be very careful about what I talk to you about.”

“Why?”

“Have you seen Back to the Future? That’s already out in your year, isn’t it?”

Jon snorts. “Of course it is and of course I have! It’s a great movie. You know the scene where—”

“Definitely.” Tommy nods. “Whatever scene you’re talking about, I know it. But that’s not the point right now. The point is, it might be dangerous for you to know things about the future. We don’t know how time works—if we have a single timeline or more than one, if changes in your timeline change things in mine. We don’t know anything, and _everything_ I tell you could have a butterfly effect, and—”

“What’s a butterfly effect?” Jon asks. He feels torn between taking Tommy’s concerns into account and being thrilled that they finally talk about it.

“Oh, right, _that_ movie isn’t out yet,” Tommy says.

They theorize for a while until Tommy suggests they watch Back to the Future. He doesn’t let Jon see how he sets up the movie, but they watch it on one of the flat TVs he’s still not allowed to talk about.

Suddenly, in the middle of it, Jon’s pulled back once more.

That evening he annoys his parents so long until they agree to get Back to the Future from the video store for him.

 

 

**1993/2010**

The next time he’s pulled through time and space he’s almost able to analyze the strange twist and turn in his stomach. He's even able to open his eyes to stare into pitch black darkness, but he gets nauseous so fast that he’s still breathing away the sickness when he hears Tommy’s voice. 

“Oh god, not _now_.” 

“Sorry to come at an inconvenient moment,” Jon murmurs, blinking open his eyes. The sickness goes as fast as it came but he still feels shaky on his legs. 

Tommy’s at his side, holding him steady by the arm. “Hey, wanna sit down for a moment?” 

“No, it’s fine. I’m okay.” Jon blinks. The travel sickness never lasts long and he feels better with every passing second. 

He looks around the room, realizing it’s not the same house like last time. But it's not a hotel either, he's sure of that. 

"Where are we?" He asks, taking in his surroundings curiously. 

"We are at home," Tommy says, looking frantically at his watch, "but that's not the problem. The problem is that my roommate will come home any minute now and I don't think I can explain you to him." 

He takes Jon by the shoulders, pushing him gently but firmly forward. 

"Hey," Jon protests, tries to swat away Tommy's hands, but he's too tall and too strong, and it just ends in them stumbling awkwardly through the room. 

Just when they almost have reached the door Tommy is obviously heading for the front door opens. Tommy stops instantly like he's glued to the spot and looks at Jon with wide eyes. 

He's standing in between Jon and the person who just arrived. Jon tries to get a look on whoever just came in, but Tommy's in his way, and Jon's pretty sure it's on purpose. 

"Hey, Tommy. Look, I brought—huh, do we have a visitor?" 

Tommy turns to Jon and says under his breath, "We're gonna try the cousin story you proposed last time." 

Then he straightens his shoulders, takes a deep breath and turns to the person. 

"Hey," he says, and Jon's sure if _he_ can hear the fake joy in Tommy's voice the person can as well. "Yeah, well, it's a bit of a strange story. My one aunt was passing through, and she has to—well, it doesn't really matter. But she left her son here. I promised her I would watch him for a couple of hours." 

He finally steps aside and Jon can see the other person for the first time. It's like he's struck by an electric jolt. His skin feels too tight all of a sudden and he's overcome by the crushing feeling of familiarity. 

The person, the guy, looks at him out of big brown eyes, eyes that feel far, far too familiar. For a couple of seconds they're just staring at each other, then the guy says, "Are you fucking _kidding_ me, Tommy?" 

"What? No! I'm—" 

"Tommy, that's not your cousin." His voice is gravely and he looks paler by the second. 

"Why would you say that? He's—" 

"Tommy, I don't know how that's even possible, but that's me." 

And at that moment Jon knows he's right, as strange as it is. At that moment he knows why the eyes look so familiar, why the guy feels so familiar. It's him. It's himself. 

And Tommy? When Jon looks at Tommy he also knows _Tommy_ knew. He doesn't look surprised at all, gnawing on his lower lip and avoiding both their eyes. 

The other Jon's still standing frozen to the spot, eyes wide and mouth almost comically wide open. He blinks a couple of times, and when Jon's still there, he asks, voice shrill, "What the fuck is happening here?" 

"Don't freak out, okay Lovett?" Tommy says, taking a couple of steps into the direction of the other Jon. "I have no idea what's happening either, but this is not the first time it does happen and if it's anything like the last times it will be temporarily." 

"What do you mean 'not the first time'? Is my younger self happily skipping around in time and met you more than once? How long has this been happening? How long have you known that's me? And why the fuck did you not tell me about it?!" 

"Hey," Tommy says softly, and crosses the last couple of steps between them, puts his hands on his shoulders, just like he did earlier with Jon, and looks him straight in the eye. "Let's sit down and we'll tell you everything we know and you can ask whatever you want, how does that sound?" 

"Don't fucking try to appease me, asshole, I have every right to be fucking angry at you!" Lovett—because that's apparently what his older self calls himself, and Jon thinks that might not be a bad idea after all—yells right into Tommy's face. 

Jon's simultaneously surprised and not at all how foul-mouthed his older self is. His parents will be so disappointed in him! 

"You're right. You're right and I should have—but I didn't. I'm sorry, okay? The first times it happened I swear I genuinely didn't even know it was you. I suspected it two years ago, but last year I got the confirmation." 

"So you didn't tell me for a whole year? What the fuck, Tommy?" 

"Hey, don't— Would you please think about it for a moment? In which way should I have approached you for this conversation? In which way, Lovett? Huh?" Tommy makes a helpless gesture. 

"You would have dragged me right to a psychiatrist if I would have told you that your 9-year-old self visited me in my apartment for two hours?! You really think you would have even entertained the idea that I might be telling the truth? Let's be real honest here for a moment." 

Lovett gives him an angry glare but presses his lips together tightly. 

Tommy once again proves as reliably level-headed in the face of a situation where absolutely no logic applies. He gets them to sit down, lets Jon tell his perspective and offers his own. They also try to answer Lovett's questions, but for the most part, they can't offer more than helpless shrugs and "I don't know"s. 

 

 

**1995/2011**

“Your timing couldn’t have been worse,” Tommy’s voice is, as always the first thing he hears. 

Jon slowly opens his eyes, unsure in which kind of scenario he landed this time. It’s the room he remembers as Tommy's bedroom. So another constant in the mix. It's strangely reassuring for Jon, even if it won't affect him or his life for longer than a couple of hours at most. Probably. They still don't really know how the whole time-travel business works. 

"Again? I need to work on my entrances," Jon says, voice dripping with sarcasm. 

"Sorry, I know it's not your fault," Tommy says and runs his hand over his face. "It's just, I'm going to leave any moment and I absolutely _can not_ take you with me." 

"Leave me here then." Jon shrugs. "I'm 13 already, I don't need a constant babysitter." 

"13," Tommy muses. "So another two years of yours and one of mine. This far our theory makes sense…" 

He looks lost in thoughts for a moment before shaking himself out of it. "And it's not about babysitting. But honestly, I don't trust a 13-year-old to not look for exactly that kind of information he's not supposed to look for." 

Jon thinks about protesting for moment, calling Tommy out for making assumptions based on Jon's age, but begrudgingly he has to accept that Tommy's right. As soon as he's out the door Jon will start searching for anything that could explain why he's sent to this place, again and again, every two years of his life. 

"Fair point," he finally agrees and it's almost worth it, just for the delighted amusement on Tommy's face. 

"So," he says, "this might be a bit unorthodox, well if unorthodox is even something you can say in this situation, but how would you feel about staying with Lovett?"

*

Lovett agrees to watch Jon and it barely feels like he's handed over from one jailer to the other. 

"I have to work for a while, but I can do that from here, no problem. What year are you living in currently? Maybe I have some old game lying around that you can play," Lovett says over his shoulder, head in a storeroom. 

Jon suddenly tastes an opportunity he can't let pass. "I'm from 1995, but can't I just play anything from your year?" 

Lovett doesn't answer, continues to rummage through a box before he lets out a triumphant sound. 

"Ahh, Donkey Kong! No idea if you've already played that in your timeline, but at some point, you will. Also, it's a classic." Lovett says and puts a worn Gameboy cartridge in Jon's hands. "You can play while I work and later we maybe can have a chat about time travel." 

Jon hasn't played it, but he still doesn't get why this of all things is a big deal. "Lovett, what harm is there in letting me play anything more recent? Come on! Let me see where technology will go. It's not like I would be able to reproduce anything!" 

"No, I can't do that." Lovett shakes his head. "Tommy's going to kill me if I do that." 

He gestures Jon out of the room and closes the door behind them. 

"He wouldn't. Also, why does Tommy make the rules here? I'm serious, what does he have to do with the whole thing? Can't we decide on our own what's best for us?" He trails after Lovett and feels awfully strange talking this way, but he's not sure how to put it in a way that sounds less like a split personality. 

"Because Tommy's part of this, for whatever reason. Like it or not," Lovett says, sitting down and opening his laptop as if to say that the discussion is over. 

"Oh, Jon, no, you can't play any games that came out after '95. Oh no, you can't go outside and you can't know the news and you can't watch any movies, but let us use the newest technology whenever and wherever we want…" Jon mutters under his breath and lets himself fall onto the couch as dramatic as he can. 

"I want you to know that I heard that but that I'm not going to acknowledge you because you know perfectly well why we do it," Lovett says without looking up. 

Jon understands it and still thinks it's absolutely hypocritical of them to be so goddamn selective about what they'll do in his present and what is "possibly time sensitive". It's a whole load of bullshit. Just because Tommy and Lovett are adults they can just pretend to know more about this than Jon does, even if he's the one time-traveling! While they have never traveled a second through time in their whole life! 

"It's fucking unfair," Jon says to Lovett and no one in particular. 

*

After a couple of hours, Lovett's done with work and Jon's still here. They've ordered food a while back, and now Jon's sitting on the couch, belly full and still a couple of hours left in this year. 

"Tommy's not coming back today, huh?" He asks Lovett who puts a glass of water in front of Jon before he sits down next to him. 

"No." Lovett shakes his head. "If your theory is correct, then you should be gone in what, two hours? You can be lucky I'm able to work from home when I need to." 

"I know, you're not going to tell me what you work as, but at least tell me if it's any cool?" 

"Oh, absolutely! It's plenty cool, just not really the kind of job where you can just take a day off at random." Lovett fidgets, taps his fingers against his own glass lets his gaze wander over the room, almost nervously. "But we really, really can not talk about where Tommy and I work. That would be a major spoiler." 

Jon pricks up his ears. "Oh, so you work together?" 

"Ugh, did I really just say that?" Lovett groans. "Forget about that, please, would you? Let's talk about something else. How 'bout that time traveling?"

*

It's so much more fun theorizing time-travel with Lovett than it is with Tommy. Lovett is like a well of knowledge when it comes to fictional time-travel concepts. 

"So you had no time-travel in your childhood? No changes about that since I last visited?" 

"No, sadly not. I'll admit, I'm totally jealous of you." Lovett sighs deeply. 

"It's not always great," Jon says and shrugs in a way he hopes looks nonchalant. He doesn't want Lovett to know how not-great it actually is. "It's confusing, you know? And I'm the odd one out either way, with or without time-travel, but it certainly doesn't help." 

It's just another piece of weight on his back, just another thing that makes Jon different. Just another thing he's not able to share with anyone. 

And there are a lot of things on his back. Things he doesn't even dare to look at, doesn't dare to acknowledge. Not even with Lovett, who knows every single one of them, minus time-travel. Lovett, who might be able to be an adult who actually understands him. But Jon doesn't think he's there just yet. Maybe in two years… 

"Hey." Lovett smiles at him and lifts his arm in a silent offer. 

Jon doesn't want to show how much he needs this, but even though they don't share the time-traveling, they share everything else, and he's sure Lovett knows exactly how bad he needs a hug right now. So he gives in, despite himself, shuffles next to Lovett and lets himself be pulled in. 

Lovett holds him close and they're silent for a long, long time. After what feels like an eternity Lovett whispers, "You're wonderful and right and perfectly okay just as you are, you know? It's gonna take you a while to understand that and even longer to really _feel_ like it, but just know that there will always be people who love you, okay?" 

Jon really wants to say something, but he doesn't know what. Lovett’s words hit him in a way that’s unexpected and overwhelming. 

"There will always be people in your life who love you unconditionally and unwavering, who help you be a better person, who you want to be a better person for. They're there and maybe it might take a while to find them or find out who they are and not everyone will be there from the beginning, but you will never be alone. And I promise you, it's gonna get better. It will, okay?" 

Jon feels tears prickle behind his eyes, so he just nods, and holds a bit closer onto Lovett.

 

 

**1997/2012**

It's been one of the worst birthdays of his life, and Jon's really, honestly excited when he feels the pull again. He's so sick of his life that he can't wait to get another glimpse into his future. The last time they saw each other Lovett had been such a great help, and it had made some nights that would otherwise have been unbearable almost easy. The knowledge that there's a future where he found a way to be happy, sometimes it's the only hopeful thought he has. 

It gets dark and silent around him once more and he's pulled into the vortex of time and space, gets twirled and spun around for what could be seconds or days, until finally everything slows down and he feels his feet hit the steady ground. 

He's so excited he doesn't even wait to hear Tommy's voice. Instead, he immediately opens his eyes to search for him, even though he knows he's going to be nauseous. 

The room he landed in is dimly lit and familiar—Tommy's bedroom, once again, he realizes when his vision clears. Not much changed since the last time. There's a plant in the corner that wasn't here before; and taking a better look at it he's sure it won't be here the next time either, too sad the way it's leaves hang down. 

And then he finally sees Tommy. At least he thinks the shape that lies in bed under the covers is Tommy. 

"Tommy?" He asks tentatively and prays that it's nobody else. How fucking awkward would that be? 

First, the body under the covers doesn't move at all and then all at once. Limbs are flailing, the covers fly off the bed and reveal Tommy, bed-haired and utterly confused. He blinks at Jon for a minute, until there's something like recognition on his face. 

"Fucking hell, I forgot about you. It's that time again, huh?" he murmurs and rubs his eyes. 

Jon still stands in the middle of the room and feels intensely awkward. Tommy's long pale legs don't help, and neither does the way his shirt is riding up at his stomach. 

He looks away, eyes falling on the digital clock beside Tommy's bed. 

"It's 10 am and you're still in bed? What happened in the last year? Did aliens replace you?" Jon tries for humor. 

"It's the weekend and I'm in a bad mood. I'm an adult—if I want to sleep until noon I can just do that," Tommy says in a tone that sounds neutral but doesn't _feel_ like it. 

Well, that worked just great, didn't it? Jon bites the inside of his bottom lip before he asks, "Is Lovett there?" Maybe it would be better to get out of Tommy's hair for a bit, he doesn't really seem like he's in the mood for babysitting Jon. 

A shadow glides over Tommy's face, so fast Jon almost doesn't notice, but then he smiles, strangely strained, and says, "No, sorry. Lovett actually moved away last year, he doesn't live here anymore." 

Jon freezes. "What? Are you kidding me?" 

He was looking forward to seeing Lovett. There are questions he has, things he would have really liked to discuss with Lovett. Jon doesn't have many adults in his life that feel like friends. Lovett did. Tommy does only sometimes, and he's not the right person to talk about these things with anyway. 

"No, I'm not kidding you, Jon. Sorry, you have to make do with just me." 

Jon finally looks at Tommy, really looks at him. He's got dark circles under his eyes and seems so incredibly tired that Jon can't help but be a bit ashamed about his disappointment. 

Still, he has to ask. "When you say 'moved away', do you mean across the street or across the country?" 

"Across the country, even though I probably shouldn't tell you—" 

"Oh fuck off," Jon explodes. "Every single time I hear the same shit from you and I'm sick and tired of it! How are we ever going to figure out why this happens and how we make it stop? I don't enjoy crashing into your life every year more than you do." 

"I'm sorry that I worry about the consequences of this?! Just because you're incapable of having second thoughts doesn't mean I'm the same! I can't just thoughtlessly walk into a catastrophe like you." Tommy's breathing hard, face red and hands balled into fists at his side. 

Jon swallows. This feels intensely personal and not at all at the same time, because he's almost sure the words are not meant for him, but for his older self. 

It's unfair. Extremely unfair. Whatever happened between Lovett and Tommy, it isn't Jon's fault. He shouldn't be punished for it. Whatever happened between Lovett and Tommy— 

Jon freezes. Oh. He was just about to yell at Tommy about how he's being unfair, but there's a sudden realization in the back of his head. His voice shakes slightly as he asks, "Were you and Lovett— were you…?" 

"What?" Tommy snaps and crosses his arms in front of his chest. 

Jon can't help but stare at his bare forearms for a heartbeat too long. When he lifts his eyes back up Tommy looks at him as if he knows, and says, almost challenging, "Were Lovett and I _what_ , Jon?" 

Jon loses all bravado he formerly had and feels his shoulders slump. "Nothing," he murmurs, "it's fine." 

It's the most uncomfortable visit so far and Jon's more than glad when he finally returns home.

 

 

**1999/2016**

“Oh fuck, you scared the shit out of me!” Tommy yelps, shrill and high, and Jon can hear something crash to the floor. 

He's almost used to the feeling of time travel by now, or maybe it's just because he's older, but it doesn't throw him off as much anymore. 

He opens his eyes and has to close them again immediately. The room is bright, much brighter than he expected it to be. 

Braced for it this time he opens his eyes again and looks around. Not familiar. Not a hotel room either. 

"Holy shit, dude. You haven't been around for years, I thought you were done with time traveling!" 

Jon searches the room, finds Tommy on the floor next to the bed, half-clothed and more surprised looking than Jon has even seen him. "You don't look _that_ much older." 

Tommy laughs. "Thank you very much, you're really charming today. But it's been four years." 

"Four years?!" That's a lot more time than normally passed between his travels. It had always been every two years for him, every year for Tommy. They had theorized if it maybe would continue that way until Jon finally would meet himself at the same age? They weren't really sure about how that would work, and there's more than one theory that Jon had elaborated only to discard it. 

He looks around. The sun's shining brightly through big windows, the room is dominated with cool, soft colors, lots of different shades of white and grey. Probably what's considered tasteful at this time, Jon suspects. 

"Hey Tommy, where are we?" 

"LA," Tommy says from where he's still sitting on the floor, disentangling himself from his pants that sit half on, half off on the middle of his knees. He looks like he's freshly showered, cheeks red and hair still wet. His thighs are pale and muscular, and he's wearing— 

Jon feels his ears turn red when he realizes he let his gaze lingers a bit too long, and he turns away quickly. Since the last time, no, if he’s honest ever since he had that uncomfortable open conversation with Lovett he had sometimes dreamed of Tommy, even if he wouldn't admit that, not even to himself. 

He swallows. "So, what are we doing in LA? Are we living here now?" 

" _We_ are living nowhere, and _I_ also don't live here, no, just here to visit a friend." 

"Are you here for my birthday?" 

"Mainly, yes. Also, a bit work related, but let's not talk about that." Tommy rolls his eyes and Jon wants nothing more than to ask, but he knows Tommy's not going to tell him. 

"So we're talking to each other again?" 

"Lovett and I never _not_ talked to each other, what are you talking about?" 

"Too much talking in one sentence, dear god, Tommy," Jon scoffs and earns a sharp belly laugh from Tommy for that. "Anyway, he moved out, didn't he? And you were totally depressed, man." 

"I was not 'totally depressed, man'," Tommy echoes him and Jon can just guess that he's now finally old enough in Tommy's eyes for him to take off the kid gloves. He has seen how Tommy talks to Lovett, it's very different than how he talks to Jon. 

"Okay, okay, if you say so." Jon gives in for now. He knows better than to start his stay on the wrong foot. He has only so much time to try to get as much information as he needs to solve this puzzle. 

"Then tell me more. Are we at Lovett's house?" It feels so strange to talk about someone in the third person when the person is you, but also not. 

Tommy bites his lower lip, nervously looking around. "You never met Favs, did you?" 

"Who's Favs?" 

"Another Jon." 

"Another one?!" Jon's glad he at least got a good surname. He started using it more after meeting Lovett. It was nice to see the name in action, on himself, to see it work. 

“Another one,” Tommy confirms. “And as far as I know he has no idea that one of his friends is time-traveling. Which—” He breaks off and rubs his chin. 

"Hey Jon, would you okay with staying at Lovett's? According to our theories, you stay will last for 32 hours this time, and I don't know how I could possibly explain you to Favs. I can come over later, but—" 

"Of course I am. It probably makes more sense to impose on him and not you." Jon shrugs. It's not the first time he had this thought. 

 

Tommy sneaks him through the garden and Jon has to crawl under a low window just one time. Five minutes later Tommy meets him on the street. 

“I already warned Lovett he’s going to have a guest. Let's go.”

“We can walk?”

“It’s just across the street,” Tommy nods into the direction they’re walking. 

Lovett’s already waiting for them at the front door, an adorable little dog in his arms. Jon’s so preoccupied by, who he learns is Pundit, that he almost misses the awkward joke Lovett makes about divorced parents and visiting rights that nobody laughs at. It’s uncomfortable in a way that Jon can’t put into words, but he’s glad when Lovett closes the door behind Tommy.

*

"So how old are you right now anyway?" Lovett asks while they sit down. Pundit is still in his arms and she looks at Jon like she doesn’t really trust him. 

Jon offers her his hand to sniff. He doesn’t fault her for being irritated at all. It’s a lot for his human brain, he doesn’t want to know how it has to be for such a tiny dog. "17, and you?" 

"I'm not gonna tell you what year it is. We're not gonna do that. I'm not going to be responsible for changing anything if I can help it. Time might be fragile, who knows? Certainly not me, which is why I'm not going to tell you anything like that."

Jon knows which year it is. He knows how old Lovett is. He just tried to make conversation, but once again that didn’t work out. Time-traveling makes socialising even more awkward.

They’re silent for a while before Jon asks, "When did you come out?" He surprises himself almost as much as he surprises Lovett with the question. 

"Jon…" 

"Hey, I could really use a bit of help here, a bit of guidance, you know? And I suppose, you _did_ at some point, didn't you?" 

Lovett scoffs. "Of course I did. Do look like I'm pretending to be heterosexual?" But he looks milder already. 

"How would I know?" Jon shrugs. "Neither of you ever bothered to tell me anything, so how the fuck am I supposed to know that?" 

"That's fair." Lovett nods and adds a moment later, "How about we take Pundit and go for a walk? We can talk there."

*

They go for a walk, a walk so long that Pundit just refuses to continue walking towards the end and Lovett makes Jon carry her. But Jon would never complain about that, because she's soft and warm again his chest, and even if she was skeptical at the beginning, she seems to have accepted him by now. 

Lovett tells him exactly how he came out and Jon laughs tears when Lovett almost gives a comedic performance of how he prepared his parents for having an important talk. 

It’s everything Jon had hoped for the last time he visited. But better late than never, huh? Just Tommy is a topic that Lovett leaves out, very pointedly. When Jon tentatively tries to broach the subject Lovett decides it’s time to drive back home. 

*

Jon places Pundit on the back seat and before Lovett can get into the car he pulls him into a quick embrace. "Thank you," he says before letting go. 

"No worries," Lovett says, smiling softly. "I'm sorry for how we've treated you before. We just wanted to make sure not to let anything bad happen, to not give you any information that could be potentially harmful. I realize now how unfair we might have been while trying to protect you. I'm sorry." 

"It's alright," Jon says and is proud of himself that you can't hear the tears that burn in his eyes in his voice. But it's fine because they both know it isn't alright but they're going to pretend otherwise. 

*

Jon knows exactly how unfair he’s being at that moment, but right when they reach the gooey traffic of LA he asks, "So now that you've decided talking to me won't alter reality, what's the deal with Tommy and you, and by proxy me?" 

He looks at Lovett's profile and doesn't miss how pink his cheeks get. 

"I have no idea what you're talking about." 

"I want to say 'you can tell yourself' that, but I'd rather you not." 

"Just saying, there's no 'deal'." Lovett shrugs and demonstratively doesn’t take his eyes off the street, even though they aren’t moving an inch. 

"I'm not five anymore, Lovett, you know that, don't you? I have eyes and I'm not stupid." 

"I didn't say you were stupid, I'm just saying there's nothing between Tommy and me you don't know about." 

"Lovett, I don't know if you realize it, but we're the same person. You're far less of a mystery to me than you seem to think." 

"Okay, fine! I give up!" Lovett throws his hands in the air and lets them fall back on the steering wheel with an audible sound that wakes Pundit up. She yelps at them before crawling on sleepy paws onto Lovett's lap. 

"Oh no, poor baby, did I wake you up?" Lovett leans down to her, rubs his face against her head and scratches her behind the ears until she happily tries to lick his nose. 

"Lovett…" 

"Okay, okay. You know perfectly well how I feel about telling you this, but yes, there was something between Tommy and me, back in DC. But that's over now and we decided to stay friends. Really, it does work so much better this way. In the end, Tommy and I were probably never really compatible, you know? Shit happens, we didn't want the same things, it's fine." 

Lovett presses his lips together and stares straight ahead. Jon can see one of his hands shaking in Pundit's fur. 

"It doesn't seem fine," Jon says quietly, "for either of you." It's not fine for him either, but that's more a vague knowledge in the back of his head than something he can put into words. 

"What do you mean for either of us?" Lovett looks at him for the first time since they've started this conversation. 

"I mean, isn't that obvious?" 

"No, it's not to be quite honest," Lovett squeaks. 

Jon unlocks his knees from where they were propped against the front console and sits up properly. "Lovett, you really think Tommy's happy to be your friend? If yes, then you're even more of an idiot than I thought!" 

Lovett's knuckles have gone white under his grip on the steering wheel. "On what base do you make that assumption?" 

"On the base that I have _eyes_!" Jon yells and just now realizes how fucking loud they've gotten. Looking past Lovett he can see the people in the car beside them watching them and their argument intently. He flips them off and turns back to Lovett, who just sits there, pale and wide-eyed. 

"I need you to not make jokes about this," he says quietly. 

"I'm not!" Jon insists. "I'm deadly serious. _Fucking ask him_ , okay?" 

"I'm not sure if I should do that." Lovett's very quiet all of a sudden. 

"Why the fuck not?!" 

"There's a lot at stakes here, Jon. A lot you don't know about, and that I can't tell you about. But please believe me when I say there's a lot for me to potentially ruin." 

"Oh my god, you two are the absolute worst people alive. What the hell happened that made me so emotionally crippled?" Jon yells and turns to look out of the passenger window. He can't believe this! There also goes his theory that he got sent here to get help for his own life. Because what kind of help could people like this actually be?!

*

They don't talk to each other the whole way back. Lovett too deep in thoughts, Jon too angry. It's not always easy, meeting yourself. 

Tommy waits for them sitting on Jon's front steps. They both see him at the same time, freeze in the same moment and it must look comical, considering the undignified snort Tommy makes. 

He still grins at them when he hops to his feet and brushes the dust off his pants. "What have the two of you been up to? I tried to call you, Lovett, but—" 

"That was by design, not by accident," Lovett interrupts Tommy, but it's not biting, it's… almost playful, Jon thinks, and the surprised but delighted look on Tommy's face only supports his interpretation. 

"Harsh," Tommy murmurs, but he can't hide the grin on his face. 

*

“So, the millennium bug is just a hoax? The world doesn't seem like a giant catastrophe happened,” Jon says later, around a mouth full of pizza. 

Lovett scoffs and Tommy gives him a warning glare. For a moment it looks like they're having a silent conversation before Lovett rolls his eyes. 

“The millennium bug just wasn’t an issue because a lot of smart people worked on it not being an issue. Don’t take things like that for granted. The world can turn to shit rather quickly.” 

“You shouldn’t tell him those things, Lovett,” Tommy hisses and elbows Lovett so hard in the ribs that he almost loses the piece of pizza in his hands. 

"Hey!" Lovett unceremoniously shoves Tommy back, not caring one bit about his greasy fingers on Tommy's pale blue button up. "Don't you dare make me waste perfectly good pizza, you bully. And also, don't you think it's time to be a bit more honest with him?" 

Tommy gives him a raised eyebrow, but he doesn't say anything. 

"I mean it, Tommy. I'm not saying let's give him a timeline of events for the next ten years, but he's not a child anymore and he doesn't deserve to be treated as one." 

"You don't know what could happen—" 

"So far it doesn't look like our timelines have any influence on each other," Jon chimes in, but he gets ignored. They seem to be in their own little world right now, staring at each other in a way that makes Jon think about how he could slip out of the room. He feels more and more like he's witnessing something he's not supposed to. 

"I still think it's too much risk to—" 

"And I think it's too much risk to my— _his_ mental health being pushed away by the only people who are willing to believe him." 

And now it's really uncomfortable for Jon. On the one hand, he's deeply touched by Lovett fighting for his cause, on the other hand— 

"Okay," Tommy says. 

"What?" Lovett and Jon ask in unison, and Jon once again cringes at how similar they are. 

"I said okay. We're not going to talk about politics, and we're not going to talk about work—that's all I'm asking." 

"Deal," Lovett immediately agrees and gives Jon a conspiratorial grin. "Now that that's settled, how about we watch a movie?" 

"A new one?" Jon grins. 

They both look at Tommy, who just sighs, and lets himself sink deeper into the couch. "Ah, goddammit. Do whatever you want, I don't give a shit!" 

He looks way too pouty for someone his age, Jon thinks, but he's not going to say that now. 

*

The first thing Jon feels when he wakes up is the crick in his neck. The first thing he hears are two voices, talking in hushed tones. It takes him a few seconds until realizes he's not in his bed, and then he remembers he's not even in his _year_. 

He lies on Jon Lovett's couch in LA, sometime in the 2010er years, if his guess is right, face pressed into a pillow that's not made to sleep on and a light blanket over him. He must have fallen asleep during the movie. Great! Just when he finally was able to convince— 

One of the voices gets louder and interrupts Jon's thoughts. 

"You don't seriously think he gets send here over and over again by whatever power it might be to save the world, do you?" 

"Maybe? I don't know, you don't know, he doesn't know. That's the point, Tommy, nobody fucking knows _anything_ , and I'm just talking possibilities." 

"Yeah, well, that's a stupid possibility. What are we supposed to do? Tell him not to write those jokes he really wants to write for the correspondents' dinner?!" 

What follows is a silence that feels way to heavy. Jon's heart is picking up speed, feels like it's tumbling over itself 

"Fuck you for implying that the whole shit is my fault," Lovett hisses. "You think I don't beat myself up enough for that already?" 

"I'm— hey, Lovett, I'm sorry," Tommy says, almost too quiet for Jon to understand his words. 

He lies very still and listens, breathing shallow, as quietly as possible to not miss any of this. It feels meaningful, in a way Jon doesn't know how to describe. 

"It's fine." 

"It's obviously not." 

They're silent for so long that Jon almost thinks about turning around and revealing that he's awake, but then he hears the rustling of fabric, and then Lovett says, 

"Can I ask you something?" 

"Sure," Tommy says, but he doesn't really sound like he means it. 

"Are you— Could you, I mean— Do you still—" 

"Lovett, what?" Jon can hear a smile in Tommy's voice and it's painfully soft, and it makes something in Jon's chest tighten. 

"Don't interrupt me, this is hard enough, and I wouldn't even do it if _he_ hadn't convinced me I should." 

Jon swears he can feel their eyes on his back and forces himself to breath deep and regularly. 

"I… Tommy I still have feelings for you." Lovett lets out a loud breath before he continues, "There, there you have it."

Jon holds his breath in anticipation of Tommy’s answer. He hopes, with everything he has, that he wasn’t wrong. That this is not going to end in the drama Lovett is afraid of. Jon’s not sure how he would deal with that, and he almost starts to regret saying anything at all when Tommy speaks again. 

His voice is rough when he asks, "When you say feelings, you mean…?" 

"My endless disdain for your pants, obviously." Jon can almost hear Lovett's eye-roll in his voice. "I still have romantic and sexual feelings for you, Tommy Vietor. Better? Or would you like me to specify the degree of my feelings as well?" 

Jon's heart is pounding so loud and hard in his chest that he almost misses Tommy's words, spoken under his breath. "You're insufferable, Jon Lovett." 

That's all he says, and Jon feels his blood freeze—until suddenly the silence gets disrupted by… other noises. The rustling of fabric again fabric, soft, wet sounds, and Jon sits up abruptly. 

He gets a good look on the kiss they share before they realize he's awake and they break away so fast that Lovett almost tumbles off the couch. 

"I was right!" Jon laughs triumphantly. "I was fucking right and you were wrong!" 

He's never going to let them live it down. 

 

 

 **2001/2020**

Jon Lovett just turned 19 and is finally out of high school and he's almost happy, for the first time in so, so long. He can't wait to meet Lovett and Tommy again to tell them, to see what they're up to. 

The last time he had left with a warm feeling in his body, knowing that they finally figured it out, finally made up. Jon's so curious how their life after might look like. Are they still living in California? Finally together again? Jon's sure there's no way they have broken up again, not after all that happened. 

He's buzzing with excitement when he gets pulled into the vortex for the eighth time in his life. 

*

When he opens his eyes again he's in a room he's never seen before. Before he can even analyze it he sees Tommy, standing in front of one of the tall windows. He's talking to someone on the phone and doesn't notice Jon's appearance at first. 

"…all I'm saying is that this can't be 2016 all over again, you know? This country's not gonna survive—" 

Jon clears his throat pointedly. He spent a lot of time being angry at Tommy and to a certain extent Lovett for not wanting to tell him the truth, but he thinks he gets it now. He understands why they decided to handle it like this. It doesn't mean that he agrees one bit with them on this, but it's still polite to announce his appearance. 

Tommy spins on the spot and his eyes get huge when he sees Jon. "Hey, sorry, something came up. I need to go. Can I call you back later?" He doesn't even seem to wait for an answer before he takes the phone off his ear and puts it away, eyes still fixed on Jon, huge and disbelievingly. 

"Jon," he says, and his voice breaks a bit towards the end. He shakes his head, laughs disbelievingly and finally crosses the distance between them to pull Jon into a hug. 

This is new, Jon thinks. Tommy never hugged him before. What the fuck happened while he was away? How long has he been away? He tentatively lifts his arms to hug back. 

"I didn't think I would see you again, to be honest," Tommy says, breaking the embrace to look at Jon. "It's been a while." 

"How—how long?" Jon asks and at least this didn't change, he's still nervous for the answer, not that it would matter. 

"Four years again. And what a four years it has been," Tommy says and looks very tired all of a sudden. 

It sends a shiver down Jon's spine. This doesn't feel like good news, not at all. 

He looks at Tommy, head to toe and wonders what it might be? Tommy doesn't look _bad_ , Jon has seen him in way worse shape and mood. This here is downright cheery compared to the forelast time. He looks a bit tired, but otherwise…? 

And then Jon's eyes catch on the gold band on Tommy's left hand. It hits him like a ton of bricks, right in the chest and for a moment he can't breathe. 

"What— you are— how could you _do_ that?" The words stumble out of his mouth, he's unable to form a complete sentence. This can't be happening. This is not right! This can not be the right timeline, he has to have landed somewhere in an universe he's never been to before. But then he realizes, this Tommy remembers him. This Tommy is _his_ Tommy. This isn't a mistake. This is just life. 

Panic swells in his chest, tighten around his ribs, slowly pressing all the air out of him. The muscles in his legs feel shaky like they're about to give up any moment, and he can't decide if he wants to sit down or run away as far as he can. 

"Jon, what are you talking about?" Tommy stares blankly at him. 

"I thought I fixed it! The last time I was here you—" Jon frantically wipes the tears from his eyes. It's not like it fucking matters, you can hear them in his voice anyway. "I thought I fixed it! You and me, you and _him_.” Lovett had promised, he had fucking promised all would be good in the end, and this isn't good, this is so far away from good. 

He's pacing up and down the room like a caged animal, and in the end, he supposes, he's nothing else. He could try to run, but Tommy's stronger and probably faster than Jon, so he doesn't think he would stand a chance. And the pure thought of Tommy holding him back, of Tommy _touching_ him makes Jon nauseous right now, too deep the shock about what _isn't_. 

"Hey, Jon, Jon, calm down," Tommy says soothingly, but Jon doesn't want to be soothed, he doesn't want to hear Tommy's excuses, doesn't want to hear Tommy give him a lengthy explanation about the why without really saying anything in the end. 

Jon's crying now for real, tears rolling down his cheeks and he doesn't even care anymore, too angry to care about anything else than the future he will not have. He snaps at Tommy, "Don't fucking tell me to calm down when you went off and married someone else! How could you do that?! I thought you and Lovett—" 

"Yes, Jon," Tommy says, smiling mildly, "me and Lovett." He lifts his hand and nods at the ring. 

Jon stops pacing to stare at him. Tommy doesn't look like he's kidding, but that can't be. "What? You mean…?" 

"Yes, Jon." Tommy smiles, almost as if he isn't able to believe it himself. 

Jon wipes away the tears from his cheeks and eyes as if this would help make the situation any clearer to him. "I don't think I understand what you're saying…" 

It feels like he understands, but he doesn't dare to hope. He already had his fair share of crestfallen hope today, he doesn't need anymore. 

Tommy opens his mouth to answer, but at this moment the front door opens and first Pundit and then Lovett enter the house. Pundit's at Jon's feet in a second, happily and excited jumping up his legs. But for once in his life he has no attention left to give her, can't stop himself from staring from Tommy to Lovett and back. 

"Jon! Hey, what a nice surprise! It's been what, Tommy, four years?" 

The happy smile on his lips slips a bit when he comes closer. "Jon? Tommy? Everything alright? Jon, you look like you cried?" 

Jon still can't stop staring, unable to say anything. 

"Hey," Tommy greets Lovett softly, pulling him into a sideways hug and pressing a kiss to his temple. "Jon was just about to congratulate us on our wedding." 

"Oh, are we telling him things now?" Lovett asks grinning, leaning into Tommy's body and interlacing the fingers of their hands. 

"Well, yes, in this case, we do, because he accused me of running off and marrying someone else, and that's not something I want him to believe happened—or will happen? I'm still not sure which tense to use here." 

"But _how_?!" Jon still thinks they have to be kidding him. "You can't be married! It's not something people like us are allowed to do." 

"I didn't lie when I told you some things will get better. This right here—marriage for everyone stupid enough to believe in everlasting love no matter their gender—is one of the things that will." 

Lovett smiles at him, and Jon doesn't know if it's how fucking happy Lovett looks or if it's just the knowledge that he will, one day, no only be able to marry, but will actually marry someone, but Jon has never before felt such a weight being taken off his shoulders. 

*

Jon stays for almost three days this time. It’s simultaneously like the best and strangest kind of vacation one could have. He still doesn’t learn anything new about the topics Tommy blacklisted, and sometimes Tommy slips into his old behavioral patterns, but everyone is so much more relaxed this time around. 

“Don’t be like that, Tommy.” Lovett laughs. “What will he do with that information? I think this right here,” he gestures around the room, to Pundit who sleeps with her head propped on Tommy’s thigh, to Tommy, to himself, to the rings on their fingers, “this right here is much more of a spoiler to his life than what video game he absolutely needs to buy in the next couple of years and which he’s better off not buying..” 

Jon feels his ears turn red. There's something embarrassing about the fact that they know about his future love life. Or the possibility of it, they still can't be sure his life will follow the same path as Lovett's, just because it did so far. Jon can't deny that he's afraid there might be a fork somewhere in their timelines and he will take the wrong path after all, but at least he was able to find a Thomas Frederick Vietor IV in his timeline as well. If the worst comes to the worst Jon’s just going to hunt him down on his own. 

“Maybe I will date someone else,” he says, just to be as contrary as he can. He doesn’t feel it. At all. Because when he looks at Tommy he sees a man that’s worth falling in love with. Someone who loves him—or the other him, or maybe it doesn't matter because it's all the same—someone who loves him unconditionally, with all his flaws and problems, unconditionally and unwavering. When he looks at Tommy and Lovett he sees two people who trust each other, two people who went through highs and lows together and somehow arrived intact on the other end. Two people who make each other laugh until they cry. When he looks at them he feels it's right, it's what it's supposed to be. 

Lovett looks at him and Jon knows he sees right through him. But he smiles softly when he says, “To miss out on meeting this guy as his youthful lanky self and knowing where the path could lead? Nah, we’d never do that.” 

And this is what sucks most about meeting yourself—there's someone who actually knows you better than you know yourself, because they're you, just with more experience. And Tommy? Well, Tommy probably has his fair share of experience with this side of him as well. So it's not like he's fooling anyone, but he still says, “Maybe I’m gonna hook up with someone else right before I’m supposed to meet Tommy, and that guy and I will fall madly in love and adopt 35 children?” 

“I wouldn’t advise on that, but you do you,” Lovett says, smiling softly at Tommy. Jon's sure he can see their intertwined hands close around each other just a bit tighter. 

They seem to have forgotten him completely, Jon thinks, and is almost sure about it when Tommy leans closer to Lovett to kiss him, tender and soft. 

Jon makes a gagging noise. They look so disgustingly happy that it's somehow hard to stand. 

But if he’s honest? He can’t wait for the future to arrive. 

**Author's Note:**

> Tempora mutantur, nos et mutamur in illis - Times are changed, we also are changed with them
> 
> Come say hello on [tumblr](https://sixtotenpotatoes.tumblr.com/) / Fic [post](https://sixtotenpotatoes.tumblr.com/post/181614350214/now-that-the-author-reveals-happened-and)


End file.
